Exasper-o-cracy

So far, I am not terribly impressed with 2010 (other than medically). It's just been an accumulation of minor nuisances and irritations up til now. My sewing machine broke. My computer got a virus. My computer stopped booting, after the virus was removed (some buildup of static. It's fine now).

The latest nuisance has kept me hopping the last two days. Social Security sent me forms to verify information on the disability claim submitted online by the law firm contracted by the long-term disabilty insurance company. It included instructions to mail corrected information and various other forms back to them along with my proof of ID if I did not wish to come into the local office. Since it's not good for chemo patients to be exposed to places like public transit and waiting rooms of any kind, I accepted the reassurance offered on the SS form that my passport would be returned to me, and mailed it to the local office (about 10 blocks from my apartment) along with other info containing my SS# all over it.

Saturday I got a call from someone at the local Social Security office asking for forms that had been included in that mailing, so I knew something was amiss. First thing yesterday morning, I went to the local SS office and sat in a crowded waiting room only to be told that no one there seemed to have my passport and then was even told that I needn't have mailed in ANYthing at all, not even the forms she had asked me for in her voicemail on Saturday, as the law firm had those on file. I told her it was pretty misleading to send me a form telling me to send all that in when they didn't need it. She was nice, but her pitiful explanation seemed geared to imply that it was my fault for mailing anything in, because "until the online claims are assigned, we don't know what to do with anything you mail in." (HUH??!!!!) My stupidity-intolerance hackles rose but it was clear she was just doing her job and had clearly embraced the byzantine and let go of the need for things to make sense in order to keep doing her job and stay sane. She was kind enough to give me her email address but no one at the office claimed any knowledge of the whereabouts of my passport by this morning. So either they have it and don't know it, or the post office managed to lose an envelope that only needed to go 10 blocks from the mailbox I dropped it in. (I've checked my credit reports -- no id theft yet. fingers crossed, please)

So yesterday, before my appointment with Dr. Liu, I dashed downtown to a place that does passport photos.

Here's the medical part, that only good part of 2010 I mentioned earlier: I have managed to make it through all these cycles, losing only about 9 lbs total. I have good tumor cell kill rates, going by flatness of the tumor alone. I'll have my CT scan on 2/3 so the effect of the chemo can be measured more accurately, and meet with Dr. Liu to discuss the results a week later. At this appointment, we'll discuss whether radiation is a viable treatment option. We'll do a blood test to make sure I'm not harboring an infection or kidney deficiencies before I travel to Puerto Vallarta. Then I probably won't have to see him, or any medical personnel until the beginning of April, at which point, I may start radiation, if that's an option.

So back to the annoying part:

First thing this morning, I went on Muni (germs! but I was planning on going on from there to the East Bay for a lunch date and taking BART) to the passport office the Department of State website indicated I should go to (Hawthorne and Folsom), only to be told that that office was only for people with appointments, and appointments could be gained only by people who were traveling within the next 2 weeks.

Again, a nice person, working in a screwed up bureaucracy was dealing with me, and at least I didn' t have to spend more than a few minutes in the crowded waiting room. She directed me to a passport office in "City Hall Annex", which made me wander around the outside of City Hall awhile wondering where the hell the annex was, again after taking the subway (where I witnessed public nose-picking and wiping of results from same on the seat. GERMS!). Anyway, it turns out it's not in no stinkin' annex. It's right inside the Van Ness entrance of City Hall for crying out loud. "Annex". Feh.

So, I get through the security screening, and find the mercifully empty Passport Services office and hand the gentleman my papers. He tells me I really need expedited service ($135.00 extra), since routine service couldn't guarantee delivery until the day AFTER I'm supposed to be in Puerto Vallarta. However, he can only accept a check or money order for the expediting fee. I had only cash and credit card.

I called and canceled my lunch date in Emeryville. Took Muni (more germs!) home, got my checkbook, and despite the rain, got on my scooter and drove back to the "City Hall Annex", parking right in front. From then on, it went very smoothly. I should have my new passport by 2/2.

Now I'm going to try to just breathe for the rest of the day. Mindful breathing. Or if that doesn't work, I have adivan and herbal things, like tea. Yeah, that's right, it's tea.